This evening, I had the pleasure of attending a book signing for Catherynne M. Valente's¹ newest novel, Palimpsest, at Between Books². It was so much more than a signing... Valente read passages from the book, and SJ Tucker³ performed songs she had written that were inspired by it. The show was haunting and magical, and I truly felt transported to another place.

Valente and Tucker's alternating passages and songs were a perfect call and answer. Valente's reading is melodic and soothing to listen to. It is obvious how much she cares for the words she's written in her attention to pacing and cadence. Her narrative paints a vivid picture of the world of Palimpsest where color, thought, and an underlying current of mystery play an enormous role. Tucker's voice is remarkable, ranging from deep, warm, rich lows to crystalline, full, bright heights. She seemed to relish in tasting each lyric with the tip of her tongue before releasing it to make sure it was perfect for her audience. Each song brought even more definition and life to the passages that Valente read.

After the performance, the two artists were more than willing to talk with fans and sign books and CDs. They were both exceedingly kind and seemed humbled by the support shown to them in the crowded, standing-room only book store. If you have the opportunity, I encourage you to attend one of their shows. If you can't do that, at least pick up a copy of the book and a few of Tucker's CDs. You will be glad that you did!


1. Catherynne M. Valente is also known as yuki_onna.

2. Between Books is an independent book store in Claymont, DE. It's owned and operated by the nicest guy you'll ever meet, Greg. After talking to you for five minutes, Greg can recommend a dozen books for you to read. You will love every one of them. He can do the same thing with games. Support your local independent book seller!

3. SJ Tucker is also known as s00j.

I've found myself with some down time, due to the fact that I can't go back to work yet, following my brain surgery. I have a lot of projects I'm working on. I always have better follow-through when I am organized. Here's the list, in no particular order:

1. I'm learning Italian. I am trying to do one lesson each morning. So far, I've covered Basics, Basic Phrases, and Transportation Nouns. The problem with learning a language from a CD is that I have no idea how any of these words are spelled, so I may have trouble reading and writing them. I need to remedy that...
   
   
2. Finish cleaning my house. I've made very little progress on this since I got back from my parents' house. I haven't even finished unpacking yet.
   
   
3. Become a smoothie making expert. I love smoothies, and I have been making them most days for breakfast. And I'm making them in a healthy way, not in a calorie-laden way.
   
   
4. Get back on track with eating right and exercising. I've lost 16 pounds since I went to the hospital, and I intend to keep it up. I've been cooking at home much more than I used to (which is much easier when I have a clean and organized kitchen), and I have been trying to do some walking every day. I am not yet allowed to exercise fully.
   
   
5. I've been reading a lot of books. I love to read, and I think I have spent more time reading than anything else. If you have the time, check out The Rule of Four by Ian Caldwell and Dustin Thomason. It's a great story, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Plus, I went to high school with them, so that's kind of cool.
   
   
6. Finish my cork board. Those of you who have ever been around me when a bottle of wine or champagne is opened know that I always keep the corks. This is because I have this vision of making a cork board out of them. I finally started putting that together today, and if I don't finish it tomorrow, I will have no where to eat dinner because it is spread out all over my kitchen table.
   
   
7. Finish various crochet projects. While I was at my parents' house, I made three baby blankets and a very cool scarf for my mom for Mother's Day. I am more than halfway through the blanket I am making for Rob, and then the line for blankets is long: Dave, my mom, my brother, and probably others that I have forgotten by now. Plus, I bought yarn for all kinds of scarves for myself and for gifts. In a similar vein, I have a needlepoint piece I have been working on for the Albans for a long time, and it would be good to make some progress on that.
   
   
8. Write an inspirational book about my experiences with facing adversity. Perhaps I should join shellefly's Sunday morning write-ins. I don't generally use that time for anything more productive. I think I even have a title: All My Light Bulbs. See if you can figure out why...
   
   
9. Start volunteering again. I don't know if I will have too much time to devote to the shelter once I go back to work, but I know they could use my help now at the height of kitten season.
   
   
10. Maintain a regular sleep schedule. Ever since my surgery, I haven't been sleeping 100% well. I tried taking some sleeping pills a few nights, but they left me needing naps the next day, and I never take naps. I didn't even do it when I was a kid. But keeping to a normal schedule is what will let me have productive days. I'm not doing well with this one tonight.
    
    
11. Do some gardening. For each of the weeds that alannariva and I pulled from my flower beds before my surgery, two more have grown in their place. I need to take care of them, and plant some flowers that are sitting on my porch.
    

I know there are more things on my list, but this will do for now.

Good night!

I have just finished reading Lance Armstrong's book It's Not About the Bike, My Journey Back to Life, and I have decided that I am just like Lance.

I have admired him for some time now for a number of reasons. He is an incredible athlete; I have some interest in cycling; he accomplished amazing things after defeating extremely severe cancer. But I didn't understand just how much he has overcome until I finished reading his book. Lance doesn't pull any punches when he is talking about cancer, chemotherapy, or his feelings during his whole experience with it and recovering from it. He is blunt, brutal, and honest throughout the book. I almost didn't continue after reading the first chapter because I was afraid it would be too grizzly for me, expecially considering that I will be having brain surgery myself in 12 days. But I am glad that I did continue on and finish the book. Lance's situation is much worse than mine is, and he went through treatments that mine will not even come close to. I cannot imagine the physical agony that he described as a result of his chemotherapy treatments. His situation was dire, and he managed to not only survive it, but to also thrive afterwards, achieving more in a few short years than many people achieve in a lifetime. I can do that, too.

Almost since the beginning, I have been saying that I don't want this tumor to define the rest of my life, that once my surgery and radiation are done with, I don't want to think about it anymore. I want to move on and accomplish the great things that I know I am destined to do. Lance Armstrong, though, defines himself completely in terms of his cancer. He says that the old Lance died the day he was diagnosed, and the new Lance was born from the trials of fighting the disease. I'm still not sure that this tumor will be my re-creation (I think I have many of the qualities and much of the insight he gained through treatment already), but I think I should reconsider ignoring its impact completely. I have been saying all along that all of my issues (particularly those related to food) are contained in the tumor, and once it is removed, I will be perfect. Making healthy decisions will come easily to me, and I will lose the weight I need to in order to be healthy and thin. That in itself is incredibly empowering, mentally, and maybe that's what the tumor is giving me.

Lance also says that if he had to pick between cancer and winning the Tour de France, he would pick cancer, because living through that disease is what taught him what he now knows about life. I don't know what I will accomplish once I am finished with my tumor, but I am not sure I would make the same choice as he does. This has been a horrible speed bump in my life, and I don't yet know if I will be irreversibly changed because of it. I do know that I can handle this, and perhaps it happened to me because am strong enough to take it. Not everyone would be. Because I am the one in five million to have this tumor, someone else less able to deal with it doesn't have to. If that is my contribution to the world, if that is G-d's reasoning for why I am the one to have this tumor, then so be it. I can deal with that. I gave a unit of blood for myself on Tuesday so that if I needed it, it would be one less unit from the general supply that would have to be used for me. It's all the same thing. I have the capacity and strength to come through this with flying colors. And I will.

The final reason I am like Lance Armstrong is because we both face a challenge the same way. He says, "But if there is one thing I don't want to hear, it's that I can't do something. Telling me that is the best way to make sure I'll do it." I've been saying that for years.

It was so busy, and I found no time to write. This last week has been a crazy whirlwind.

( The details )

Shelle told me that traceyleabeezus wanted to meet me after reading my LiveJournal, so I'm adding her to my friend list. Hi!

I came across this website - Bookcrossing.com - as I was perusing some random-ish LiveJournals today. I can't decide how I feel about the concept, though; it's part Where's George, part library, and part Napster/Kazaa. It's the last part that bugs me, I guess, except it's not really the same thing at all. Book trading is not like electronic song trading, because you aren't actually making a copy of the book. And so I don't have a problem with that. It's an interesting concept, anyway...

1. You can own one Great piece of Art (you'll loan it to museums now and then so that the rest of the world can see it). Assuming you have the space for any piece you want, which one and why?
Any landscape of the American West by Albert Bierstadt. I saw an exhibit of his paintings at the National Gallery once, many years ago, and they still leave an impression on me. His canvases are so huge that you can get lost in the painting as if you were almost there.

2. What is your dream job?
Concert pianist chef for NASA who is a golf pro on the side. No seriously, I don't know. One where I could do something I love, that would help others, and allow me to make an impact on the world. And make lots of money :) I'd probably have a lot of fun being a wedding planner, but it doesn't fit the making an impact on the world bill. Maybe I could be an event planner for non-profit organizations. I could totally organize charity balls!

3. Who are some of your favorite authors (and why)?
I really love most of the things I have read by Orson Scott Card, though he does get a little preachy for my tastes on occasion. He writes engaging stories from a wide variety of genres, and they are always well-researched. I do love the Game of Thrones series by George R. R. Martin (and thank you shellefly for getting me hooked!) though I haven't read anything else of his. I love J. K. Rowling for the Harry Potter books, but I must admit I didn't enjoy the fifth one as much as the rest. I think I need to give it another read or two though. I love Steven Brust. His characters and worlds are so well-developed, and even though they are fantastical, they are still accessible. His characters still seem human.

4. If you could choose more money or more time, which would you choose and why?
This is a hard question, because I'd really like both, so I have to figure out which will be better for getting me more of the other. I think the answer is time, because that time can be used in so many different ways, including for making more money. I'm always wishing I had more hours in the day, and all the money in the world won't get me that.

5. Space travel or African Safari?
Space travel, no contest.


And now: THE RULES
1 - Leave a comment, saying you want to be interviewed.
2 - I will respond; I'll ask you five questions.
3 - You'll update your journal with my five questions, and your five answers.
4 - You'll include this explanation.
5 - You'll ask other people five questions when they want to be interviewed

Also, if anyone else wants to interview me, leave your 5 questions in the comments

1. If you could go back in time to view or take part in any one event, what would it be?
Oh, so many choices! But since I must only pick one, I pick the Constitutional Convention. That room was filled with greatness, and I would be honored and humbled by being in its presence. Those men had such vision, and I would like to let them know that they created a powerful, long-lasting document that guides our nation today as well as it did at the beginning.

2. How do you think your "charmed life" has affected your ability to deal with your recent health woes?
Well, it's certainly kept me from jumping off a cliff :) I truly believe that when all is said and done with my tumor, I will be fine. I know that life will never hand me something that I am not capable of dealing with, and I will be stronger in the end for having faced adversity. And it makes the good times that much sweeter. I have tried to face the whole situation with humor, because I think if I really stopped to think about how scary it is, I would be crying all the time.

3. What is one song you've always wanted to perform? (I know it's been a while since you've sung, but...)
You know, I've never been a soloist (though I guess the question doesn't really ask about being a soloist...), but I wish I had sung "The Chickens In the Army" at my grandfather's burial. When I was little, both of my grandparents used to sing goofy songs to me, and when my grandmother died, my mother and I sang the Bumblebee Song she used to sing for me. I don't know what kept me from singing for my grandfather, but I kind of wish I had.

4. How many cats is too many and why?
I think the answer is different for each person. The mundane answer is that it depends on finances and living arrangements. But since there is a good likelihood that I will end up with five someday in the not-so-distant future, I'll have to go with six as being too many. Why? There's not enough time in the day to pay attention to them all and still hold down a job so you can afford them :)

5. What literary character do you most identify with?
I don't know if I identify with her most of all literary characters, but I do identify with Valentine Wiggins from the Ender books by Orson Scott Card. She is brilliant and wants to make the world a better place. She loves her family, and wants to protect and empower them. She is a mediator and a peacemaker. Her love is her weakness, too.

And now: THE RULES
1 - Leave a comment, saying you want to be interviewed.
2 - I will respond; I'll ask you five questions.
3 - You'll update your journal with my five questions, and your five answers.
4 - You'll include this explanation.
5 - You'll ask other people five questions when they want to be interviewed

Also, if anyone else wants to interview me, leave your 5 questions in the comments

I'm hungry, but I don't want to go out to get something to eat. I guess that's a good thing, but I'm only going to be starving later, and then I will just eat the first thing I can get my hands on, which will probably be Girl Scout cookies. If only they were frozen. Thin Mints are always better frozen.

I just finished reading a book called Always the Bridesmaid by Whitney Lyles. It's one of those cheesy chick novels that are becoming so popular lately. Some of them are good, like Jennifer Weiner's Good in Bed. I really connected with that character, and though I doubt it would ever be confused for great literature, it was good read. This one, though: I could take it or leave it. I could have written it. The author is 26 years old and has been in five weddings or something, none of which were her own. Actually, I think I could have written it better, but I think the market is over-saturated with books like that: stories about 20-something girls with relationship problems. They always have a happy ending though. The girl always ends up with the cute and funny best-friend boy she never thought of like that before. Perhaps shellefly would consider that this genre is really a fairy tale dressed in modern clothes. It follows that classic structure. The characters have those same archetypes. But for the most part, I think they are missing something... maybe some drama or angst or conflict. It all just seemed so superficial, and I knew exactly what would happen on every page. No twists or turns or dark corners to explore.

I used to confuse angst with teenage immaturity. It was never something I had experienced much of, and I always assumed people would grow out of it. But now I am beginning to see that it is not the angst itself that is childish; it's how you deal with it. Wallowing in self-pity is never something I've been very good at, and I have very little patience for people who do. If you ask me now, a good story needs the angst. But I just can't stand a main character who's pathetic. Heroes are go-getters. They triumph against all odds. Tragedy only makes them stronger, but if the tragedy weren't there in the first place, there would be no background upon which they could shine. Just no teenage angst, please... that's just whiny :)